Terrible sex is never in the cards for anyone, but we’ve all been there. Those moments when the anticipation builds, expectations soar, and then… cue the disappointment music… the sex falls flat. It happens to the best of us.
We’ve got your back with a short guide on what to do after experiencing less-than-stellar romps between the sheets. Whether it’s an expectation vs. reality performance, unexpected mishaps, a partner not caring enough to take their time with you or simply a complete mismatch of chemistry, we can all relate.
Of course, I’m not referring to situations where you didn’t feel respected or safe (no second chances there!), but rather when there isn’t sexual chemistry.
Most people (read: women) know what it’s like to have terrible sex. For a good percentage of the world, their first time was particularly bad. Over time, we’ve had to learn what good sex feels like and more often than not, we learn by self-exploration.
After an underwhelming experience in the bedroom, it’s important to remember that laughter and self-care can be the best remedies. So, here are three things you can do when sex with a new partner leaves you (and your vagina) feeling, well, nothing.
First Things First: Breathe
Girl, I know.
It can be incredibly frustrating to anticipate good sex only for it to be underwhelming, especially if your partner had hyped it up with a series of texts promising to over-deliver. If you’ve been eagerly looking forward to it and the experience ends up being awkward and disappointing, take a deep breath – we’ve all been there. Your partner’s inability to pleasure you, for whatever reason, doesn’t have to mean the end of the experience for you.
Say goodbye to memories of the mediocre encounter you just had, and either block them or openly communicate with them about how they can please you better.
Whichever way you choose to go, remember that sex is supposed to be pleasurable for you. It doesn’t have to end when your partner climaxes. As a woman, always leave room for mind-blowing experiences that leave you floating on cloud nine.
A Date With Your Vibrator
When it comes to turning the tables after an unsatisfying sexual encounter, sometimes the best partner you can have is yourself.
After your sexual partner has slept, left your home or any equivalent, lock the door and settle in for a delightful date with your trusty companion, your almighty vibrator. If you need to set the mood with some music and low lighting, a scented candle, a joint, or a glass of wine, do that and trust that where your sexual partner failed, your toy won’t.
When you’re ready, turn it on and put it where feels good. This small but mighty device holds the power to transport you to a realm of unadulterated pleasure. If you know, you know.
Embrace The “Laugh It Off” Therapy
Laughter truly is the best medicine, especially when it comes to post-awful sex healing. Summon your best friend, pour some wine, and share your hilarious horror stories. Exchange laugh-snorting details and find some peace in the fact that you’re not alone.
Remember, a good giggle can release the tension and remind you that sex doesn’t always have to be perfect to be enjoyable.
Awful sex happens, but it doesn’t have to ruin your day. It’s essential to find humour, self-indulgence, and empowerment after an unsatisfying experience. Embrace the opportunity to take charge of your pleasure, share a good laugh with your girlfriends, and revive your inner goddess. Remember, a single underwhelming encounter shouldn’t define your entire sexual experience.
Additionally, if it was with your partner, always communicate. Honest and open conversations about your desires, boundaries, and preferences can only help improve your sex lives. Don’t be afraid to speak up and advocate for your needs. After all, great sex takes effort from all parties.
