Do you know why your progenitors are called parents? It’s because when you live with them, you don’t pay rent.
On a more serious note, though you may save money on rent, you pay for the free habitation in other ways. You may pay with your mental health or with round-the-clock butler services— something has to give.
Even if you’re having the time of your life, eating free food and frolicking at your parent’s expense, when you reach a certain age, even if you don’t want to leave, they’re probably tired of you and want you out. Your freeloading days cannot last forever, and here are some signs that it’s due to come to an end, whether by your design or by your parents kicking you out or heavily hinting you into oblivion.
- “Ah Ahn, You’re Back Early?”
When it becomes obvious that your parents are no longer happy to see you, you should probably start house hunting. Slight comments, hmms and sighs will tell you that they’re tired of you and would love to begin a long-distance relationship. When you return home, they’re unenthusiastic and start asking you questions like when are you going out again and won’t you go and stay with so and so friend, know that they’ve seen you too much, are sick of you and need you out!
- When You’re In Your Late 20s And You’re Still Washing Plates
Everyone knows that doing the dishes is the absolute worst chore ever and is assigned to the youngest sibling. If you, as an adult are still assigned the responsibility of washing plates, that is the height of see finish. Your mates already have children that are readying themselves for the dishwashing mantle to pass to them. If you find yourself obligatorily washing dishes that you did not use, it’s time for some serious reevaluation.
- When Your Parents Keep Reminding You That You’re Now Big
Picture this, your mother flings open the door to your room, standing in the doorframe with her hand on the handle, neither in nor out. She looks up at the ceiling wistfully and reminds you of when you were younger. She reminisces on something or the other that happened in that very room, oh how time flies. You can’t complain about the lack of privacy because after all, it’s her house and she means well, she simply wants to take a trip with you down memory lane. She says wow, how big you’ve grown, you of yesterday?
When they’re constantly reminding you of your age and telling you things their friend’s children or your cousins your age are doing, they’re heavily hinting that you should follow suit.
- When You Still Need To Ask Permission To Do Certain Things
As a full-grown adult, imagine still having a curfew or needing to inform mummy and daddy before you make decisions concerning yourself that they may disapprove of, not because you’re committing a crime or doing something evil, but because they’re older, have different views and what people will think is important to them. When you reach a certain age, you should have autonomy over decisions in your life that would have been outsourced to your parents before then. If you’re at the stage where you’re supposed to seize the reins of your life and order your steps as you please because the consequences are yours to bear, you should probably be doing that from the comfort of your own home. If you’re still enjoying free food and rent, your parents can and will expect to have a say in said decisions.
- When Your Siblings Have Started moving out
If you’re the last born, then by all means, wait for those who came before you to leave first, they’ve lived there longer. However, if your younger siblings have already started moving out, that’s probably your cue to start mobilising too. When your parents are already making remodelling plans; how they’ll turn this person’s room into a gym and that person’s room into an office, you should know that they probably have plans for your room too.
Nigerian parents, unlike their western counterparts will probably be content to have you live with them for as long as you’d like. They’re not likely to herd you out the door unless your character is bad, so you may feel inclined to sit back and relax. I mean, have you seen the price of rent? Service charges? Miscellaneous? Horrendous. However, there’s a certain level of growth that can only come with independence and self-sufficiency, so even if they’re not pushing you out of the nest, consider leaving.
There’s nothing like the safety net that loving parents provide, but it’ll reach a point where you have to tow your own path and enjoy their support on occasion when needed and at a distance. Good luck!