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6 Ways You Might Be Body-Shaming Women Without Realizing it

The Editors by The Editors
in Self
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As long as you have a body, you have probably felt like its been subject to scrutiny at some point in your life. The worst part is, body-shaming is usually camouflaged as a compliment, when really its an insult.

Body-shaming is never okay, even if said with good intentions it doesn’t mean it will hurt less, which is why we need to do better in being more aware of comments we make to our loved ones, or even strangers.

Nigerian aunties and uncles are the kings and queens of passing unsolicited comments about our bodies. A lot of us grew up insecure due to the years of accepting backhanded compliments from loved ones. It’s not okay.

We’re adults, so we should know better and understand that bodies come in all different shapes and sizes, and sometimes you might mean well by encouraging a friend to shed some pounds, or applauding a friend for losing weight, but what we need to understand is that we’re accidentally shaming others without realising it.


1. “Did you lose some weight? You look SO much better”

This has to be the most insulting of all because even if you mean well, what you’re really saying is: You looked so much worse when you were fat.

Instead of commenting on a woman’s weight, why don’t you just mind your business by keeping your statement simple and short? Instead, just say: You look great. Period. 

2. “Girl, you’re so lucky you’re skinny. You can eat whatever you want”

Another reason why you should always keep weight comments to yourself, is because you never really know what a person is going through. 

Again, you might mean well but what if the person has an eating disorder? Or what if they are struggling with a disease/condition? 

Honestly, the next time you want to comment on someone’s body, just don’t.

3. “You’re pretty for a plus-size girl”

Or “stop saying you’re fat, you’re actually pretty.”

Both comments are so insulting because you’re implying that plus-sized women are generally not beautiful.

4. “Are you sure you’ll be able to eat all that food?”

Just so you know, this is rude as f***.

If you say this to anyone, plus-size or otherwise, you’re not being helpful. You’re actually being sizeist. 

If a woman wants to eat a big portion of food, it’s because she wants to. Is it your mouth? focus on your own plate and nourish your own body. 

Even if you didn’t mean it in an insulting way, it’s still going to sound rude.

5. Commenting on women’s postpartum bodies

Why is society so obsessed with a woman’s postpartum body? 

A woman gives birth, and suddenly people are secretly keeping an eye out for how long it would take for her to regain her figure. 

Instead of commenting on her body, whether you’re trying to praise her or not, why not just ask questions that I’m sure will be appreciated; How are you doing? How are you feeling?

6. “Oh wow. You’re really tall for a girl”

Someone should come and tell me what us tall girls are supposed to do with this information. 

I can’t do anything about being tall, same way you can’t do anything about being short. 

When people say this, are they implying that your height makes you less feminine, or what? I’ve never really understood it.


What are some ways you think people body-shame without even realising it? Tell us in the comments!

Tags: backhanded complimentsbody shamebody shaming
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The Editors

The Editors

The Editors of 21 - young African women conquering the world, one day at a time.

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