2020 genuinely felt like a whole decade, and don’t even get me started on all the drama and baggage it brought along. Forever and ever, and ever, and did I mention ever? 2020 will always go down as the Covid-19 pandemic year that changed the world.
With all of the struggles this year handed to us, some people dealt with theirs in the comfort of the embrace of their boyfriend’s and girlfriends, some even with their fiancé’s and fiancées – Set awon I’m in a relationship.
Some of us on the other hand went through this craziness single, and alone. Not that there’s anything wrong with being single, of course not. But abeg, the struggle this year was too much. Feeling loved and having a boo to vent to about the crazy year that was 2020 wouldn’t have been too bad.
We always keep it one hundred at 21, so truthfully speaking, I was in a relationship for the first and better half of the year, and single for the second half. In the big idea of that, I thought to share some of the Pros and Cons of being single in this Epic drama called 2020.
Access to Different Partners
The lockdown was one of the biggest highlights of 2020, and social media was all of the buzz that was keeping us sane during those trying times. Across all social media platforms, a lot of people were attempting to shoot their shots and participate in what they probably knew was going to be a temporary relationship. It was great because the subject of the lockdown was a good conversation starter.
It is safe to say a lot of talking stages were going on at that time. Anyone in a relationship would feel guilty replying the DMs of a potential lockdown lover (except Nigerian men). But as singles, absolutely no guilt! Replying DMs, flirting, and participating in multiple talking stages with our full chest, like we were made for it. In fact, if I do say so myself, I was just out here helping the world and minimizing male depression one DM at a time. Hand me my Nobel Peace Prize please!
Self Reflection and Self Development
2020 was definitely a year that left us searching for ourselves, and what it means to actually live. It was a year that put a lot of time in our hands to plan and develop ourselves mentally, take deep breaths and appreciate our mental health. I was having a conversation with a group of friends recently on how 2020 really taught us to appreciate adaptation, alternatives and Plan B’s.
I’m not saying you can’t self-reflect with a partner around, I just believe it isn’t as satisfying as doing it alone. Cheers to the agelong phrase – Me, Myself & I.
We Saved Money, Duh!
You see this thing called being in a relationship? it’s expensive. Having to spoil your partner and shower them with gifts often, in this economy? Omo.
I absolutely loved the financial freedom that came with 2020. No stress over Valentine’s day, No Bae’s birthday expenses, and absolutely no Christmas gifts!
Weddings Were Drastically Reduced
Jokes on you! You thought you could shame us again? Put us in bridesmaid dresses and have us compiling Aso Ebi in our wardrobes? Well, not this year- Try again later. Attending weddings as a single, is actually one of the most depressing things ever. It makes you question yourself, like; Am I not worthy of love? Or, Where is my own groom? And when you think you’ve found answers to these questions and your mind is at peace, African Aunties and relatives will come around to kill the joy with questions like “When are we coming to your own wedding?” Well, take your questions and swallow it, because 2020 didn’t take us near situations like that. It’s either the weddings were postponed, or the ones that still had coconut head and decided to wed, (it’s not like we’re not happy for you sha) could only take a minimum number of attendees, of which unnecessary guests were not invited.
Singles – 1. African Aunties – 0.
The Birth Of ‘God When’
As if 2020 wasn’t bad enough, this was the year people choked us singles with relationship and engagement pictures. Even vacation pictures too! Like, sorry to burst your happy bubble but where are you going sef? in a pandemic? small small now. Although if I had a boo that wanted to fly me to a private island for a baecation, I too would have flooded images on the timeline, but that’s besides the point.
Imagine scrolling through your timeline like you do everyday, and before you know it, you’ve come across relationship Twitter, “My View, His View” tweets and so on.
It really hits you that you’re single when the only romance you can relate to is self -love (which is actually the best love). And so of course you hit the comment section flooding it with “God when? Am I not your child too? God but I have ring finger too“.
Real hot girl tears.
The lockdown period came with a lot of lonely days and nights. I can’t even fake it, there really were a lot of nights where all I wanted was to be pampered, cuddled, spoken to nicely, and just be in love.
News flash, my single ass got none of that. What I got however, was a lot of sleep.
100% Bills On Us!
This one is quite painful. There are just some things in life that are sweeter when shared with your partner, and bills happens to be one of them. Eating out and ordering food is the one that hurts me the most; Having to order a small platter of food you can’t really finish, when you could have had a medium platter with your partner, which would have been more cost effective and would have filled you both up nicely, or buying an event ticket at a ridiculous price, when you could have had it discounted if you were coming in as a couple? Such discrimination. There are a whole lot more of Single Bills frustration, but let’s not recount those annoying experiences too much.
No Special Person To Share New Music With
Personally I thrive in music, and I love to share the song or playlist I’m currently vibing to with somebody special, especially when the person likes my style of music. Did we have good music this year? Hell yeah. Foreign and Nigerian artists really gave us some crazy hits in 2020, so what happens when there is no one to share your current favorite song or album with? It’s a thing o, and if you’ve been there, you’ll understand.
The frustration is real when you really want somebody to be on the same musical wavelength as you, and you realize you don’t have a partner for that. Thank God for friends at least!
As exhausting as the year was, who do you think won 2020?
The people in relationships, or the singles?